


hold me in the golden afterlife

by nosutarujia



Category: MapleStory
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-28
Updated: 2018-08-29
Packaged: 2019-07-03 16:08:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15822354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nosutarujia/pseuds/nosutarujia
Summary: A crippled Luminous is saved by two strangers in the desert, one of whom is a mysterious young man who inspires feelings in him that he thought had been lost long ago.





	1. Chapter 1

“Do you think he’ll live?”

“Most likely. His injuries are far from grievous.”

Water. He wanted water. Luminous’s tongue felt like dead weight in the back of his dry, itchy throat. There were voices around him. Who were they? With a slight shudder, he forced his eyes open and found himself staring up at a straw roof. Streaks of light were pouring through the cracks in the roof and they illuminated the dust motes in the surrounding air. The sight mesmerised him for a moment as he realised that he was, in fact, still alive.

And then it all hit him. The escape. The desert. The sun. He groaned weakly as the memories came thundering back into his mind before his thoughts abruptly shifted to water once more. Gods, he was so thirsty.

“Oh, and he’s awake,” said a voice not too far from him.

“Water…” Luminous managed to croak in reply. He was about to close his eyes once more to just get a _little_ more rest, when his instincts suddenly kicked in. Where the hell was he? Newfound strength and fear now in him, Luminous sat up using his good arm, cold sweat chilling his body as his thoughts went into overdrive.

There were two men sitting in front of him. One of them was old and grey-haired, wearing glasses that sat on the bridge of his long nose. The other was young and blond with a plain white blindfold covering his eyes. Neither appeared to be threat, but Luminous couldn’t bring himself to untense his body. Narrowing his eyes, he casually lowered his left hand to the pocket of his robe, relieved to feel the outline of his switchblade.

“Who are you?” Luminous asked.

The blindfolded man spoke up. “I’m Phantom, and this is my companion, Gaston. Would you have the good grace to tell us your name too?”

Luminous considered it for a second. Judging by what he last remembered, he was most likely still in the Ariant. He wasn’t sure how far he’d have to run in order to escape the soldiers that had been pursuing him, but he knew that he wasn’t safe neither here or in his homeland. He’d have to go farther. He stared at the blindfolded man, Phantom, who was smiling. His kingdom and theirs, they were at war. Why did they save him if he was the enemy?

“My name is Luminous,” he said after another moment of consideration. “I’m grateful that you helped me, but I must be going.”

He didn’t make it far, however. Immediately after trying to stand up, Luminous was hit by a wave of dizziness that made him lose his balance. Gaston managed to grab his arm before he fell, though, saving him from hitting his head and probably passing out again.

“No, no, you must rest. You may not be in mortal danger, but I fear the exposure from the sun has taken quite a toll on your body,” Gaston said firmly, helping Luminous back down, so that he was leaning against the wall and could easily see what was going on. “Foreigners such as yourself tend to underestimate the full might of our deserts.”

So they knew. Luminous didn’t have the energy to fight them. All he could ask was, “Why are you helping me?”

“It is not us, the civilians, who are at war. Ariant or Aurora, we are merely forced to fight,” Phantom jumped in. Gaston nodded.

“Mister Phantom speaks true. I knew it would’ve been what he wanted, for me to bring you back here. And so, it was what I did. Allow me to bring you something to drink.”

Luminous almost wanted to laugh. It felt so ironic that he was safer behind enemy lines than around his own people. He glanced at the bandaged stump where his right arm used to be. He should’ve died that day. As a scholar on the battlefield, he had been completely out of his element. And yet, he didn’t die. He would live on, and fight on, as he did not lose his sword arm, and he would die at the next battle because he was a cripple.

But he had been too scared of dying. He was a coward, and he ran, and now here he was, associating with the enemy. But were they really his enemies? They had never done anything to wrong him. It was as Phantom had said - they were merely pawns in a game of war. Luminous looked over Phantom and Gaston again, scrutinizing their everything. Two men of fighting age not engaged in war was an odd sight to see these days. But he suppose his own situation was odd enough, so he didn’t ask any questions.

“You have my most sincere thanks for saving my life,” Luminous said slowly as Gaston returned from the other side of the small house with a clay pitcher and cup. He had to force himself to wait patiently as Gaston poured the water into the cup and handed it to him, but once the cup was in his hands, Luminous drank like he never did before. He took long, greedy gulps of water and felt it rejuvenate his scratchy throat. It was like when it rained in the desert and all the flora and fauna returned to life. It felt perfect.

He went through at least three more cups of water before he felt sated and adjusted his position so that he was laying back down. The adrenaline was gone from his body now, and he felt the warmth of the air and the coziness of the room close in on him, enticing him to rest once more. The soles of his feet ached from traversing great spans of land in a matter of a few days, and he was more than a little hungry, but those things could wait. For now, Luminous felt, everything was fine as it was.

“Our guest seems to be drifting off once more.”

“Poor thing. I bet he’s quite mangled from trekking through sand dunes.”

“Your manners, Mister Phantom.”

“Ah, right.”

If Luminous had been awake, he would’ve told Phantom to try and do what he did without coming out looking ‘quite mangled’. But he was already drifting off into sleep, so he let it slide just this one time, allowing himself to fall into the dark embrace of slumber without any further interruption.

 

* * *

 

_There he was again, the man who had taken his right arm. Luminous stared into the man’s faceless face, unable to move.  He could see everything - the way the man’s torso turned ever so slightly as he reeled back, preparing to cut off Luminous’s arm with one mighty blow; the Ariant’s golden insignia brightly painted onto the surface of his shield, catching the light at that very moment; the small bits of rust and dirt speckled onto his armour like freckles on skin; yet Luminous, try as he might, could not make out the face of the man who had altered his life. He was helpless, frozen in time as the sword slowly made its way towards his flesh._

_And then everything stopped. Right before the sword reached his exposed arm, it ceased movement, as if time itself had been frozen. Luminous directed his gaze back towards the man’s face to see it shrouded in black now. Two piercing yellow eyes stared out from the darkness directly at Luminous._

_“Cowards can never flee their fate,” a voice rasped. It was coming from the unknown man._

_“I’m not a coward if I have the courage to live,” Luminous growled._

_“But do you have...the courage to die?”_

_Just like that, time unfroze. The sword finished swinging, the yellow eyes were gone, and Luminous’s own eyes widened as he saw the blade slice through the cloth of his robe, grazing against his flesh before sinking in and cutting his arm off cleanly, the limb falling to the ground without making a noise. Anger filled Luminous suddenly, and just like he did on that day, he plunged the sword into the soldier’s exposed neck with all his strength, killing the man. He could hear the shouts of his comrades as he started to grow dizzy from blood loss and pain, but he couldn’t respond._

_All he could see in the growing darkness were those yellow eyes once more._

With a gasp, Luminous woke up in cold sweat for the second time in recent memory. He blinked rapidly, looking around in the darkness of the hut. There were no yellow eyes, no faceless men, no battlefields. Taking several deep breaths, he tried to calm himself down, but to no avail. He felt the same anger that had been present in his dream gnawing at his chest, telling him that he wasn’t good enough. That he was a coward. That he should’ve just died that day instead of trying to grab at scraps of life that were just out of reach. Luminous shuddered. He couldn’t bring himself to close his eyes because he didn’t want to see those yellow eyes again, those lifeless, all-seeing yellow eyes.

They knew more about him than he did, and that terrified him to no extent.

Looking off into the darkness, Luminous tried to find some sort of comfort, some sort of light. He tried to think of fond memories to wash away the bad. Anything, he thought, desperately searching through his memories of warfare and bloodshed.

And then he found it. A small token of light in the far reaches of his mind, nestled in the back of the attic of his thoughts. Lania. The woman who had taken him in after his house burnt down, killing his parents. That night when she had rescued him from the fire, when the burns were still fresh on his pale skin, she had hummed a song as she worked on tending to his wounds.

The song had always given him shivers.

“ _Oh, read to me those tales of glory_ ,” he murmured, and then decided to hum the rest so as to not wake up Phantom or Gaston. It was the lullaby that she used to sing to him every night before he slept as a child, and it was with that that she made all his awful nightmares go away single handedly. But no matter how hard he tried, he could only remember the first stanza -

_Of lands far away, where the sun rose each day,_

_Of lands far away, where children forever played._

_And even if our forever is just a momentary stay,_

_There will always be moments still touched by the sun's golden rays._

The melody was soft, lilting, and felt familiar, from the first time he had heard it to now, when he hummed it to himself in the darkness of a foreign house in a foreign land. The words of the song seemed to dance within the music, even though his lips did not part to say them, and as he repeatedly hummed the tune, Luminous could feel his heart rate slowing down, his muscles relaxing. Those were the happy, simple days. He remembered nothing of his life prior to that moment - it was as if Luminous had become aware of his own existence that night in Lania’s arms. From that point to the night Lania first fell sick, those were the days he truly _lived_.

What he wouldn’t give to have things be like that again.

“What are you doing up at a time like this?” Phantom’s voice asked from the darkness.

Luminous abruptly stopped his humming, stiffening for a moment as he realised he had been caught. How long had Phantom been listening for?

“I’m just thinking,” Luminous mumbled. He shifted his blankets awkwardly. “Why are you awake?”

“Because you woke me up,” Phantom said, laughing. His laugh was sweet and mellow, like a rosy dawn. “I didn’t know people from Aurora thought aloud in song.”

Luminous felt his face grow warm. “I’m going back to sleep.”

“Oh, no, don’t,” Phantom said quickly. “Tell me more about the song. I liked it very much. What is it called?”

“I don’t know,” Luminous admitted. He thought for a moment before saying his next words. “It’s something my mother used to sing to me.”

“I see. Your mother had excellent taste in music, then,” Phantom chuckled. “Would you mind singing it for me? It might help me sleep.”

“I’m _not_ going to sing you to sleep,” Luminous said flatly.

“I even asked nicely.” Phantom sighed. “Hm, what approach should I try now…”

“What?”

“Forgive me, I was just thinking aloud, like you.”

Luminous rolled his eyes, but for once in a life, he had no comeback. Talking with Phantom was like being driven around in circles. The man was too ridiculous, honestly.

“So, how about it?” Phantom asked again, interrupting Luminous’s train of thoughts. “You don’t need to worry about Gaston. He sleeps through everything. Though I do feel sorry for him, being unable to hear your lovely voice.”

Lovely voice? Luminous was glad it was pitch black, so that Phantom couldn’t see his face turn red. That was something he had never heard before. It was probably the idiot’s attempt at flattering him into embarrassing himself.

Not to say that the flattery didn’t work very well.

“Don’t you dare tell anyone about this,” Luminous muttered. Phantom’s words were getting to his head, he thought. But he almost...liked it. It had been a long time since anyone had said anything nice to him. And even when people did, it was always about his intelligence, never about _other things_.

“Not a single soul,” Phantom promised with another laugh.

Unsure of what to do, Luminous opened his mouth and began to sing softly, hoping that nobody but Phantom would hear. He tried his best to stay in tune, suddenly awfully aware of the fact that he had never sung for someone before. It was his voice, his voice that was singing the soft melody that floated throughout the room like a warm desert breeze. It was _his_ lovely voice. The words slipped out of his mouth naturally, familiar on his tongue despite the fact that he had never said them aloud before. His voice cracked a little when he neared the end of the song, his mind drifting to thoughts of golden sunshine and imaginary utopias, but besides that, he thought he did a decent job at it. The room felt oddly silent once he finished.

“You are quite talented, aren’t you?” Phantom asked at last, breaking the stillness. “Perhaps not the most well-taught, but you certainly have the capacity for emotion.”

The magic was gone. Luminous was back in the hut with Phantom, back in the real world, and his face once more became flushed at the comment. “Are you satisfied now?” he deadpanned. Why did this man’s words make him feel so strange?

“Very,” Phantom said, yawning. “Thank you, Luminous. It was a pleasure.”

“You’re...welcome,” Luminous said quietly. Something, something about Phantom’s words twisted the way he felt inside, squeezing his beaten and worn out heart until it was capable of feeling all these long-forgotten emotions again. Those words, ‘ _your lovely voice_ ’, they awoke a part of Luminous that he thought had died long ago - the part of him that ached to feel, ached to find beauty, and ached to live a meaningful life.

The world had taken everything that he held dear, Luminous thought, laying there in the darkness and waiting for sleep to overtake him. The war had taken his arm, his dignity, his honour. He thought he had lost it all. But why was it, then, that this aching part of him still remained? Luminous closed his eyes.

Perhaps you simply couldn’t think out the answers to some things.

At least, not just yet.


	2. Chapter 2

As pleasant as his stay had been, Luminous decided, after he woke up, that he would take his leave soon. 

“I appreciate all you’ve done for me. Truly. But I must continue with my travels,” Luminous announced during breakfast. He took another bite out of his bread, covered in a creamy cheese he had never tasted before. He wanted to soak in the moment while he still could, before he went back out under the glaring sun and continued his journey. 

“So soon?” Phantom asked, disappointment fringing his words. Luminous watched as he felt around the table for the cup of tea Gaston had poured him moments before. He hadn’t thought about it before in his half-asleep half-awake haze when they initially met, but after observing Phantom’s movements for a while, Luminous realised that the man was blind. The cloth he used to cover his eyes, the way Gaston had to help him move about the small room, it all made sense now:

Phantom was a cripple, just like him.

“I’m afraid that neither you nor I will be safe as long as I stay,” Luminous put the last piece of his bread into his mouth and chewed a bit before swallowing. “I would hate to endanger the peace that you have created for yourselves.”

“It may not be the best time to leave,” said Gaston, placing a piece of the cheese-covered bread onto Phantom’s plate and sliding it towards him. “I was on my way to a nearby town when I chanced upon you yesterday. Quite a stroke of luck, I would say. Even in that short distance, I was stopped and questioned by two soldiers. The perimetres of the area are quite heavily patrolled at the moment.”

Luminous fell silent for a moment, considering his options. “Do you have any idea how long it will be that way for?”

“A few more days, at the very least. There was an attempted attack on the town a few weeks ago. Soldiers have been stationed near the perimetres in anticipation of another.”

“Stay a day or two more, until the situation clears up.” Phantom carefully reached for the bread placed in front of him and took a bite. “You can entertain me for the meanwhile. I haven’t talked to someone besides Gaston in months.”

“It doesn’t seem I have much of a choice,” Luminous sighed. If any Ariant soldier caught him, he’d most likely be killed, or even better, sent to a labour camp, where he’d work until he died. He had seen the prisoners of said camps a month ago, when his unit had freed them once they had driven the Ariant forces back. They were starving, their ribs bulging out against their sunburned, whipped skin. Some of the corpses that had been buried were worse off, barely recognisable.

He refused to meet such a fate. Luminous took a deep breath to clear his mind of the images. The Aurora soldiers were most likely occupied with routing Ariant forces. Most likely, they wouldn’t have time to track down traitors until the war settled, he reasoned. The men that had initially been sent after him probably gave up after a few miles of pursuit. Perhaps he would be safe here.

“Well, if you do intend to stay, I must go to town to purchase more supplies,” Gaston said, interrupting Luminous’s thoughts and standing up. “I intended to go yesterday, but as you very well know, I was met with more urgent matters.”

“I hope you manage to find some sugar,” Phantom said, finishing the last of his meal. “Luminous hasn’t had the good fortune to taste your delicious biscuits yet.”

“I will try my best,” Gaston replied. He wrapped and tied a cloth around his head, forming a neat turban. “Mister Luminous, do take care of Phantom for me and make sure he doesn’t get into any trouble.”

“Of course.” 

“I’m no longer a child,” Phantom protested, pursing his lips as Gaston left. “I’m a fully capable adult. Luminous, don’t you agree?”

Luminous raised his eyebrows. “A fully capable adult that still manages to concern his caretaker with his behaviour, obviously.”

“Gaston worries far too much,” Phantom pressed on. “I know my way around the house, and I have enough sanity left to know not to wander outside. What’s the worst that could happen?”

“You could get killed by Aurora soldiers that suddenly decide to invade the area.”

Phantom smirked. “But as long as you are here, my knight in shining armor, I have nothing to fear, right?”

“It’s rude to mock your guests, you know.” Luminous rolled his eyes and took a sip out of the morning tea left in his cup. 

“I sincerely apologise,” Phantom said in the least sincere tone Luminous had ever heard. “Tell me about yourself. I’m quite curious as to why a warrior such as yourself isn’t with Aurora’s army.”

“A warrior?” Luminous scoffed. “I’m no warrior. I was drafted into the army, I barely know how to wield a sword.”

“What did you do before? The war, I mean.”

“I was a scholar and a scribe from a small town,” Luminous said, setting his cup down. “I copied books and recorded events.”

“Books?” Phantom’s tone suddenly became coloured with interest. “You must know of many stories. Tell me one. It has been so long since I’ve heard an interesting tale.”

“You sound like a child asking for a bedtime story.”

“I will concede that I do, in fact, sometimes revert back to being a child,” Phantom chuckled. “Now, tell me your favourite story. Or I will continue to mock you until finally consent.”

“What a terrifying threat. I suppose I have no choice but to comply,” Luminous said dryly, holding back an amused smile. It was so hard to say no to Phantom. He had an innate charm to him - that, coupled with his sweet laugh and dimpled smile made his demands difficult to resist. And to make it even better, Phantom had found his weak spot. Luminous loved the work he used to do, even if it meant that he was secluded from the outside world for most of his life. Even if it meant that he, more often than not, felt lonely and unwanted by the people around him.

Maybe it was for the best. He always seemed to bring tragedy to the people that he loved.

“Have you heard the story of Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves?” Luminous asked after running through his mental list of folktales. When Phantom shook his head, Luminous couldn’t help but feel satisfied, knowing that he had found the perfect story. It was from the Ariant and it featured quick witted characters that would no doubt delight Phantom. Luminous sat silent for a moment, trying to record this strange feeling of accomplishment into his heart. With all his knowledge of stories, history, and lore, it seemed a waste that he never had someone to share his passion with. 

He wanted to remember this first time forever.

Making sure to choose his words carefully, Luminous began to weave his tale, hoping that he could capture some of the story’s otherworldliness with his voice alone. He began, describing Ali Baba as a handsome but poor young man who chanced upon the treasure cave of a group of thieves. Luminous spoke of the magic words that Ali Baba used to open the cave, and how Cassim’s greed resulted in his tragic demise, as well as the thieves’ plan to kill Ali Baba after discovering that someone could open the cave. Not once did Phantom interrupt him through this - but the part that seemed to intrigue Phantom the most was when Luminous described the deeds of Morgiana, the slave girl who outwitted the evil thieves and single handedly saved her master’s life over and over again. 

“I like Morgiana very much,” Phantom said as soon as Luminous was done with the story. There was a wide grin on his face. “She reminds me of you.”

Luminous took a moment to consider the comment. “How so?”

“She’s full of intelligence and surprises. That, and she’s loyal to Ali Baba throughout the entire story without expecting anything in return. I can feel that you are a loyal person like her. Brave, too.”

“Brave,” Luminous said slowly. He sat there, quiet as Phantom rambled on about how he would make a spectacular Ali Baba. Maybe it was time to tell Phantom the truth. He and Gaston had been nothing but honest and open with him, and it would only be fair for Luminous to do the same. After all, there was no harm in doing so. The pair had no way of using the information against him. But the real reason was because it felt so  _ wrong _ to let Phantom think that he was something that he wasn’t. Not when the truth was so drastically different.

He was so deep in thought that he didn’t even notice that Phantom had stopped talking.

“What’s wrong?” the blind man asked. “You’re oddly silent.”

Luminous took a deep breath. “There’s something I have to tell you.” 

“Go on.”

“The reason I’m here…” Luminous swallowed, looking down at his lap. “ You deserve to know the truth. It’s because I ran away from the army. I’m a coward. When I lost my arm in combat, I thought they would dismiss me. But when they didn’t, and made me fight on, I knew...I knew that I didn’t want to die.”

“I see.”

“There are people after me,” Luminous continued. “The Aurora kingdom treats treason as a capital offence. If they find me, then I will lose my life. And so, I run. That is all I know how to do. I may be many things, but brave is not one of them.”

“You can be anything you wish to be,” Phantom said after a minute. His voice was soft. “Look at me for a second.”

When Luminous raised his gaze, he found himself unable to hold back his gasp. Phantom had removed his blindfold. 

For the first time, Luminous noticed the details about the man - the way his curly, golden hair framed his high cheekbones, the way his lips were just the perfect colour, soft and rosy, and the way his small chin was always tilted slightly upwards, as if forever in defiance. He would’ve had a perfect face, the face of a prince, if it weren’t for his eyes. 

Or rather, the area where his eyes should have been.

A large, serrated scar ran across the upper portion of his face, disfiguring the skin there and twisting it into a terrible, wrinkled shape. His eyelids, also distorted, were awkwardly closed, as if struggling to maintain their current position. Luminous couldn’t help but stare, unable to tear his gaze away from the malformity on Phantom’s near-perfect face.

“When I was a child, my mother and I were set upon by bandits,” Phantom said quietly. “They killed our companions, they killed my mother, and they would’ve killed me as well, if the king’s guard arrived any later. They took the two things most dear to me away - my mother, and my life as I knew it.”

“I was helpless to stop it,” Phantom continued, his grip tightening on the blindfold in his hand. “And I’ve been like this ever since. I was afraid of how dark it was, at first. But then I realised I was only afraid because I chose to be, not because anyone made me feel that way. I am telling you all this so that you know, you can be brave if you want. And I believe you will be, one day.”

“You think too highly of me,” Luminous murmured. He watched as Phantom put the blindfold back on, concealing the scar once more. “I am no Morgiana, and I am definitely no knight.”

“There is a difference between thinking highly of someone and believing in them.” Phantom smiled, placing his hands on the table palms up. “Give me your hand.”

Hesitating only slightly, Luminous lowered his hand into Phantom’s. He was surprised by how soft they were, warm and uncalloused unlike his own. He couldn’t help but shudder, too, as Phantom gently traced the palm of his hand, as if searching for something.  The feeling of Phantom’s touch sent shivers up Luminous’s spine.

“Your hands are interesting. Your fate line starts off very faint,” Phantom noted, pressing his index finger against the center of Luminous’s palm. “Such a line hints that you have been spending your entire life feeling inadequate, trying to fulfill impossible expectations. There are many circles on your fate line as well, symbolising the difficult life you’ve overcome so far. But your line forks. You will make an important decision one day, Luminous. I think your chance at being brave will come one day, and one day soon.”

“Where did you learn to read palms?” Luminous asked, shivering again at Phantom’s words. They were spoken in his warm, friendly tone, yet they made him feel ominously cold for a reason he couldn’t discern.

Phantom’s brilliant laughter, however, broke that dark feeling as soon as it rang out, illuminating every corner of the room.

“Oh, I’ve been here and there,” the blind man grinned, releasing Luminous’s hands abruptly. “I picked up a few tricks throughout my life, and I’ve always wanted to test them on someone.”

“You’re quite the character, aren’t you?” Luminous suppressed a chuckle. Gods above, Phantom’s happiness felt so contagious. “If anything, I think  _ you _ are the one full of surprises.”

“Oh, no, I’d much rather be Ali Baba. I think he suits me much more, being opportunistic and handsome.”

“I doubt he had such a big ego to boot,” Luminous snorted.

“But I’m not wrong, am I? You basically just admitted that I’m opportunistic and handsome,” Phantom teased, and for the first time since they had met, Luminous found himself unable to hold back his smile. It didn’t even matter that Phantom couldn’t see it, as Luminous had a feeling that somehow, eyes or no eyes, Phantom knew that his mouth was curved upwards in that moment - a rare, nearly perfect moment, Luminous would treasure for the rest of his life.

 


End file.
